your baby can app!

i was over on cafe mom this morning, reading the stir and i read a post which debated the topic of self-help books and apps for children.  are you kidding me?  the talk was about the newest app on the IPAD called the grouchies.  this app helps to teach your children how to deal with their emotions.  well, this topic brought up the next topic of all of the self help books for children, now available on amazon and in libraries around the world.  on cafemom, she was just saying exactly what i feel... if you're going to let your child use these apps or books, make sure you sit down and go over them with your child.  don't just open the IPAD or the book and leave the child alone to make sense of it all.  i'm sure these apps can be very helpful for many children and mothers/fathers if used correctly.  they aren't meant to be used as babysitters or to make life explanations easier for us as parents.  it is ultimately still our job to make sure our children learn what is necessary.

this really got me thinking about education and playtime for the newest of generations.  the dynamics have changed so much.  we have gotten so lazy in teaching our children.  while i do believe technology is obviously very important for my child this day in age, i don't believe anything can replace good old-fashioned learning.  you know, the imaginative and hands-on way?  i watch my daughter develop daily.  she does have a lot of toys with all the bells and whistles and she likes them sometimes, but when i see her grow the most is when she's left to use her imagination outside in nature, or playing with pots and pans or blocks or just coloring.  when she's left alone with some sticks and her imagination, i can really see her wheels turning.  when she's given blocks, just plain old blocks, i watch her become more mechanical and detailed with her hands.  whatever happened to fingerpainting?  we still do it here at my house, but i know so many little kids today that wouldn't know fingerpaint if they were swimming in it.  all these little kids with their DS systems and their cellphones and their mini laptops... geeeeeez.

like i said, i'm not knocking technology at all.  i mean, i wouldn't even be able to write this blog if it weren't for technology, but i think there's a time and a place for it.  as for me and my daughter, we'll continue to incorporate nature and good, old-fashioned hands-on fun!

Here are some pictures of my sweet girl having some real good fun!!!

FINGERPAINT!!!

ENJOYING TIME ON HER SLIDE

LOVES PLAYING WITH STICKS!

PETTING THE GOATS AT THE ZOO!

LOVES PLAYING ON THE GATOR

4-WHEELIN'

HER VERY FIRST HORSEBACK RIDE!

LOVIN' THE HORSES

AT THE RIVER

PLAYING IN THE RIVER

Time-In

my toddler decided to throw a huge tantrum this morning.  her fits have become much more common as of late.  she's fierce and loud when she's upset and it could be really easy for me to treat her the way i was treated as a child.  but, as she flailed around in the floor pitching her fit this morning, i remembered the promise i made to myself and to her when she was born:  to handle her as a human being.  my little human being.  my precious gift.  i've been given the opportunity to be a mother, which is something many women will never experience.  so, with that in mind, i sat next to her in the floor and spoke softly to her.  after she quit kicking, i lifted her, hugged her and started to speak to her in a very low tone.  the immediate response is peaceful.  loving.  calm.  she accepts my calmness and it gives her good energy.  i slowly explain to her (in the best way possible for a two year old) that her actions were not nice and that it feels better to be happy and not mad.  i say, "give mommy a kiss".  she does.  then we get up and play.  tantrum over.  mommy feels happy and so does baby.

this is something i've heard described as "time-in".  very different from "time-out".  time-out is a good alternative to spanking and i know many people believe that time-out really works well for children.  but, time-in is an even better alternative, in my opinion.  when a child is left in time-out, they are stuck in a corner to sit for a period of time and sometimes they aren't even told what they did and/or how to change it next time.  they spend those minutes away from the parent feeling alone and confused and probably aren't really thinking of their mistakes.  time-in allows what i like to call "little lecture" time.  my definition of "little lecture" is just that the parent spends time helping the child understand the consequences of his/her actions in a real life situation.  the child gets the chance to see her parent react with love, patience and understanding, thus teaching the child to react with love and patience in difficult situations.

another aspect of time-in isn't just when the child misbehaves.  it's also constantly re-enforcing positive behavior.  noticing the good behavior, as well as the bad behavior.  when you catch your child doing something generous or good, catch them!  tell them how wonderful they are being!  immediately tell them.  immediate feedback is a must for small children especially.  the attention span is short for a small child.  maybe tell others how great your child is in front of your child.  this is also VERY effective in building their self-confidence and re-enforcing good behavior.  discipline should be a positive thing.  it should help mold and shape the child, not hinder them. 

so...  time-in:  great alternative to time-out.  best disciplining/ parenting technique i've found.  i'm not perfect and sometimes i mess up and get frustrated with my daughter when i shouldn't.  but, as i'm working on her, i'm also always working on myself.  this whole parenting thing is making me a better person :)  she's teaching me so much...

there's a good bit of information available on time-in and time-out and the pros and cons of each, but this lady is using the "time-in" technique very similarly to the way i will use it with my daughter.  click the link below to get a better idea of how "time-in" can be used in your home:

http://joanneaz_2.tripod.com/positivedisciplineresourcecenter/id26.html

the sign of the twins.

Today I decided I wanted to read up on Annabelle's astrological sign in baby terms.  I know all about Geminis, but I was curious to see what was said about babies in this zodiac sign.  Not only is Annabelle a Gemini, but she shares my father's birthday, and we all know how well i don't get along with him.  Needless to say, I'm nervous about the years ahead.  Read on... if you know my Annabelle, it will shock you at how accurately this describes her.  Lord, help me...

Gemini Baby

The Gemini child is very curious. All facets of life fascinate him, and he loves to explore nature. Gemini Baby quickly learns how to talk and walk. His parents must watch him carefully because he often strays from view. He needs to wander, to walk, to know, to communicate. He gets bored quite easily, and needs to develop multiple interests. He is the kind of person who can do many things at the same time. Any kind of repression or obstruction of his freedom could provoke an emotional depression which could be very difficult for him to overcome.

If he needs to be confined to a small space, he should have many toys, books, a TV and someone to talk to. He is the kind of child who makes people nervous, because he is in constant motion and nothing stops him from talking. It is not a good idea to tell him that it would be much better if he tried to behave as other children who react slower and not as imaginatively. The challenge is to make him reduce the speed of his life without frustrating his basic nature.

He is very sociable, bright, precocious, and always asking questions. He is very clever, and he excels in intellectual activities: mathematics, literature, languages, etc. He does not have trouble learning unless the subject becomes boring for him. His hands are expressive and agile and he can easily mimic. It would be a good idea to give him a magic game as a present, in order to develop the natural talent he possesses.

Sometimes he exaggerates, lies, and makes fun of people. He has a very good imagination, often embellishes the truth, and even believes his own fantasies. The Gemini child must be taught to tell the truth and to develop his fantasies in writing. If Gemini Baby does not learn how to express himself without inhibitions, he could become very introverted when grown-up, as a way of self-protection. He is never satisfied with one activity at a time and is able to do homework while listening to the radio.

His main problems are: lack of patience, lack of perseverance to get deeper into detail, and being too easily influenced by others. As this child grows, parents should get to know their child's friends. As a youngster, he will be always talking on the phone, going out with different friends every week and changing his mind about his future career. His parents should not be worried about this, because their child is one of the smartest persons in the zodiac, and he will surely impress everyone with his many facets, brightness, and eloquence. He will be always naive and childish; for this reason, he must learn the importance of responsible behavior.

inspiration for your hump...

Yuni words of wisdom

I've learned that you cannot make someone love you. All you can do is be someone who can be loved. The rest is up to them. I've learned that no matter how much I care, some people just don't care back. I've learned that it takes years to build up trust and only seconds to destroy it. I've learned that it's not what you have in your live, but who you have in your life that counts. I've learned that you can get by on charm for about fifteen minutes, after that, you'd better know something.

I've learned that you shouldn't compare yourself to the best others can do, but to the best you can do. I've learned that it's not what happens to people, it's what they do about it. I've learned that no matter how thin you slice it, there are always two sides. I've learned that you should always leave loved ones with loving words. It may be the last time you'll see them. I've learned that you can keep going long after you think you can't.

I've learned that heroes are the people who do what has to be done when it needs to be done, regardless of the consequences. I've learned that there are people, who love you dearly, but just don't know how to show it. I've learned that sometimes when I'm angry I have the right to be angry but that doesn't give me the right to be cruel. I've learned that true friendship continues to grow even over the longest distance same goes for true love.

I've learned that no matter how good a friend is, they're going to hurt you every once in a while and you must forgive them for that. I've learned that it isn't always enough to be forgive by others, sometimes you have to learn to forgive yourself. I've learned that no matter how bad your heart is broken, the world doesn't stop for your grief. I've learned that just because two people argue, it doesn't mean they don't love each other and just because they don't argue, it doesn't mean they do.

I've learned that sometimes you have to put the individual ahead of their actions. I've learned that two people can look at the exact same thing and see something totally different. I've learned that no matter the consequences, those who are honest with themselves get farther in life. I've learned that your life can be changed in a matter of hours when a friend cries out to you, you will find the strength to help.

I've learned that writing, As well as talking, Can ease emotional pains. I've learned that the people you care most about in life are taken from you too soon. I've learned that it's hard to determine where to draw the line between being nice and not hurting people's feelings and standing up for what you believe. I've learned to love and be loved. I've learned.

squashing my case of the mondays...

i'm always getting the sunday blues.  i've struggled with it for as long as i can remember.  well, the sunday blues lead to a horrible case of the mondays.  i've been trying to find a way to break up my weeks and make them a little easier and less redundant.  so, in order to squash my case of the mondays i'm going to start a new routine.  each monday i will either go on an outing/adventure (usually with annabelle, but sometimes this will be special mommy time for myself) or work on a new craft project in order to expand my tutu store. 

last monday, annabelle and i went to the river with a friend and her son.  it made monday seem a little less mundane.  today i'm going to price some things for my tutu store.  i'm going to be branching out and making things other than tutus and hairbows.  i'm excited for this!

so, my suggestion for a case of the mondays?  even if you work a 9-5 job, take time at some point during your monday to do something different.  something a little more exciting than usual, just to spice up your day.  even if it's just trying a new place for lunch or stopping off for one happy hour drink or an ice cream break right after work.  maybe you want to make monday your family's night out to dinner night each week?  or maybe a pizza night?  if you're a stay-at-home mommy like me, maybe you wanna make monday your field trip day or your craft day?  start your week off happy and make sure to make monday your best day!

the cons...

i always try to sum up my reasons for not vaccinating the best way i know how, but i somehow always leave out things that are important to me.  and then i'm like, "oh man, i meant to tell them this, oh and this"... there's so much more than what always comes out in conversation, since it's usually less of a conversation and more of a debate.  i found this post on bellybelly and thought it pretty well summed up most of my main reasons for choosing to refuse shots.  check it out:


http://www.bellybelly.com.au/articles/baby/question-vaccinations

these are a few of my favorite things...

my sweet brandy texted me this morning to ask me what some of my favorite things were.  what a sweetheart.  she's so thoughtful.  guess she's just been thinking of me.  so, it inspired me to write a list.  here are a few of my favorite things in the world...

-big bear hugs that last forever.
-forehead kisses that surprise me.
-baby feet
-the smell of fresh cut grass
-music.  any and all kinds.  i don't discriminate.
-very dark chocolate.  i also love all chocolate.  don't really discriminate with that either.
-being barefoot.  i would never ever wear shoes if i didn't have to. :)
-sunshine.  especially the day after a storm.
-the sound of the river. 
-being on the lake at dusk.  watching the sun set and the lake become still again.
-dancing.  mostly alone.  i love rockin it out in my living room with my sweet girl.
-waterfalls.  there is nothing as peaceful to me as a waterfall.
-good wine.  actually i don't discriminate here either.  i love all wine. 
-all day long beach days when i leave the beach before dinner covered in salt and sand with sunkissed skin.
-animals, of all kinds.  but especially dogs.  and horses.  i really want a horse.
-puppy breath.  that might sound weird.  but it's nostalgic for me.
-annabelle's kisses and sweet baby girl hugs.
-football saturdays in good ole clemson.  there's nothing better than fall and football in TIGER country.
-summer weekends spent on the lake.  we live off of sun, water and a little bit of food :) 
-fresh fruits and veggies straight from the garden.  nothing feels better than putting clean food in my body.
-front porch sitting.  on anyone's front porch :)
-pictures.  people pick on me and say it must not happen if i don't take a million pictures.  but yes, i feel that i want to document every single important moment of my life.  so, pictures are definitely a favorite thing!
-special mommy/daughter times with annabelle grace.  special trips alone, coloring time or even just cuddle time on the couch.
-baseball.  every single thing about baseball.  the love of the game.  the men.  the uniforms.  the season.  and there's no better baseball than clemson baseball- sitting on cheap seats, drinking beer and listening to the outfielders being heckled by our fans :)
-waking up before the rest of the world and watching it become busy...
-staying up later than the rest of the world and watching it become peaceful again.  no noise.  just quiet.  there's something really moving about this.  i don't know why.